Monday, November 28, 2011

Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown: The Season of Quitters


The fourth season of Survivor Philippines may well be the shortest season in all of Survivor franchises worldwide because this season is turning out to be the season of quitters. At day 6 or 7, the tribes are ready to merge because five people have already quit.

At the last tribal council of Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown, Jackie Forster and Angelicopter quit. Five minutes after the conclusion of the Tribal Council, starlet Ellen Adarna and her boylet Filo also quit. Only hours into the season, Geneva Cruz, the trainwreck, left the island for reasons that even her therapist would be hard pressed to understand.

Whether the three means girls and 'da who' were influenced by host Richard Gutierrez basically berating them for being the whining-est tribe to ever be formed on Survivor Philippines' four seasons, we'll never know.

What I know is that these bitches, Filo included, were way in over themselves. Whatever excuses they came up with to explain their exit, fact is they couldn't cut it in a harsh environment. And Jackie Forster chose the wrong show to show her sons that she has finally developed a good side.

And we know that those bitches got outplayed by the "cancer" of the Tala tribe, Maribel Lopez. Can those bitches hold their heads high knowing that they got played by Maribel Lopez? No, they couldn't that's why they are still whining and being bitter in Twitterverse.

The filming was over months ago. The castaways and crew have returned to the real world and those bitches They're not the avid fans of Survivor that they are claiming to be. If they are they would know how to separate the game from the real world. Get over it, bitches. And get over, Arnold!

KC Concepcion Confirms Split with Piolo Pascual

The KC Concepcion/Piolo Pascual romance is no more according to KC herself.

KC Concepcion confirmed what a lot of people already know: she and Piolo Pascual have broken up. This is not the usual breakup of a popular celebrity couple because everybody wants to know whether real reason behind the breakup is because Piolo Pascual is GAY.

KC's interview with Boy Abunda on The Buzz is the vaguest you can imagine. But since most of us are good at reading between the lines, putting two and two together, we know WHY the relationship broke up.

For the unfortunate few fans who are still under the illusion that Piolo Pascual is straight and he will marry you someday, here's my straight-to-the-point translation of what KC Concepcion wanted to say but can't.

KC: "May mga hinahanap ako na basic lang na hahanapin ng isang babae sa isang boyfriend, sa isang lalaki.

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: "Gusto ko ng romance, hug, kiss or sex kaya. Kaso I don't have the right sexual organ."
KC: "Kahit may mga times na hindi ko siya maintindihan, tinanggap ko kasi sinasabi sa akin ng mga kaibigan namin na personality niya yun.

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: "Nagfa face powder si Piolo, nagli-lipstick pa. Nakikipag-agawan pa siya sa akin minsan. Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit pero sabi ng mga friends naming ganun talaga ang hilig ng bakla."
KC: "May mga bagay na hindi ko na kayang lunukin, hindi ko na kaya yun tanggapin..."

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: "okay lang na nagme make-up siya, pero nahuli ko siya sa kama nakatalukbong ng kumot na may katabi. Hindi ko na kinaya kasi akala ko babae, yun pala lalaki."
KC: "Ayoko pong sagutin, Tito Boy [kung may third party involved]."

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: Please refer to my previous statement.
KC: "Ewan ko kung bakit, paanong nangyari yung pain, at saka yung sama ng loob naging galit. Na talagang nagugulat din ako kasi first time ko rin na parang napapamura na rin ako. Hindi naman ako ganon, and bigla na lang akong maiiyak kasi hindi pala ako okay. "And then siya [Piolo], natatawa lang siya kapag nakikita kong ini-interview siya, idadaan lang niya sa joke."

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: "Piolo is not just into me."
KC: "Tito Boy, naniniwala naman ako na pag sinasabi ni PJ na minahal niya ako, naniniwala naman ako na meron namang katotohanan iyon. Pero, masakit man sabihin, hindi ako yung, siguro nag-fail din ako dahil hindi ako yung kailangan niya sa buhay niya. Or, hindi ako yung hinahanap niya sa buhay niya. And hindi...hindi ko mabigay sa kanya yung kailangan niya.

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: "Tito Boy, hindi ako ang kailangan ni Piolo dahil ang kailangan nya ay LALAKI. Hindi ko maibigay ang kailangan nya dahil ang preference nya ay etits, hindi keps."
KC: [On her one wish] "Na makahanap talaga ako ng true love!"

WHAT KC REALLY MEANS: "Na makahanap talaga ako ng tunay na LALAKI!"
If that doesn't convince you, then watch Sharon Cuneta give a laugh, a non-laugh as in not amused, when asked by Cristy Fermin on Paparazzi if the split between her daughter KC and Piolo Pascual is because Piolo is gay.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown: The Volcanoes

The challenges and drama are heating up on week two of Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown.

The Volcanoes tandem of John and Arnold won the Immunity Challenge, Bola Bola, for the Bulan Tribe. These guys are beasts because they are also largely to thank for the Bulan tribe's victory in the Reward Challenge earlier.

The drama all came down during the Immunity Challenge, courtesy of Angelicopter, Jackie Forster and Isabel Granada. The ladies went up in arms, and even Angelicopter went inside the mud pit to "rescue" her tribe mate Carlo who was run over by the ball being maneuvered by Arnold from the Bulan tribe. Why did this happen? Obviously, because the challenge is very physical, adrenaline is running, and Carlo is trying to be great to the point of being stupid. Would you stand still even when you see a rampaging boulder coming towards you?

Angelicopter, Jackie and Isabel cannot understand this and cried foul, calling Arnold "masamang tao and other names." LOL… Say, what?! In a physical challenge and in a game like Survivor, you get banged and you get bruised. If you can't imagine getting hurt or going hungry, open your Facebook account and play CafĂ© World or Farmville.

Those three irk me because they are the types of women who fight for equal rights and opportunities for women, but who are also ready to raise the gender card to fight their battles. Why wouldn't Arnold talk back or say shut up, when all you three were shouting him to death? Just because you're women?! Ten steps back for the Women Empowerment!!

Next time on Survivor Philippines, they're voting out two people. I hope one of them is Angelicopter or Ellen Adarna. The former is bossy and mouthy, and the latter is a downlow, sneaky little bitch.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Jose Midas Marquez: Gay?


Supreme Court Spokesperson Jose Midas Marquez was caught unawares by a wayward mic and in the process revealed that not everything he touches is gold, it's PINK! lol

Is SC Spokesperson Jose Midas Marquez gay? watch this video and you be the judge!

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown: Geneva Cruz is a Train Wreck.


I got suckered into watching the latest edition of Survivor Philippines at it promises to outwhine on top of outwit, outplay and outlast. I'm also looking forward to seeing Survivor Philippines host Richard Gutierrez lose his cool over the excessive whining and entitlement of the castaways during one Tribal Council.

It's day one and Geneva Cruz, who is paired up with ex-husband KC Montero, has already brought the drama and the crazy on Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown.

This is why you don't join a reality show with your ex if you two still have unresolved issues between the two of you, or if you're taking meds to keep the crazy at bay and the show's requirement is to leave those meds at home.

What was the reason for Geneva's breakdown? As far as I can gather from Geneva's rantings, she did not want to be there lying and scheming to win 3 million pesos. Geneva went because KC persuaded her to join. Well, Geneva can't very well accuse her ex of using her because she gave her consent to join the reality show. But even the onsite psychologist can't reason out with Geneva Cruz's crazy.

Oh well, Geneva Cruz quit Survivor Philippines Celebrity Doubles Showdown and KC Montero got to stay. Fuck the rules that say "your partner quits and you're out too." I would have love to see more of Geneva's cray cray, but I think the remote island of San Vicente in Palawan will not be able to cope.

According to Geneva, there was no reconciliation between her and KC while on the island. Now we know why. She couldn't even last 24 hours on the island! Poor guy had to deal with that level of crazy for years? Someone tell KC to run as far away from her crazy ex as possible.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Gwendoline Ruais is Ms World 2011 First Runner Up


Apparently it's still beauty contest season and I was unaware of it. Woke up this morning to the TV blasting the Ms World 2011 awards ceremony. There was also the Ms International tilt happening simultaneously.

French Pinay beauty Gwendoline Ruais placed first runner-up in the 2011 Ms World Beauty Contest held in the UK. She looks like a tranny, but she won so that's that!

Surprise! Suprise! (not!) Ms Venezuela won the crown. Not impressed.

Venezuelan beauty bets are known to undergo "Olympic-style" training prior to competing in these beauty pageants. Everything that can be fixed on these Venezuelan bets are fixed, including a flawed nose, flat chest or non-existent chin, but they can't or won't speak in English like the rest of the non-English speaking contestants. I suspect it's not the substance of their answers in the Q&A but the beauty of the Spanish language that win judges. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

Anyway, I am so glad another Pinay beauty almost won in another international beauty contest. Not because I buy into the "beauty with a purpose" thing. It's because of two things:

First, winning first runner up means the media can finally shut their cameras and voice recorders on the overrated Shamcey Supsup, 3rd runner-up in the 2011 Ms Universe contest. Just shut it already. Jon Santos' impersonation of Shamcey Supsup is more interesting than any sound bite coming from the real thing. Sad, but it's time to pack up.

Second, first runner-up in the Ms World contest is equal to First Princess. This will, I hope, shut up everyone who continues to use the tag "second princess" on Ruffa Gutierrez. Please, the bitch is a has-been and her time was over a decade ago. Ruffa Gutierrez is so early 1990s.

Now, I suspect I'd get tired of Ms Gwendoline Ruais First Runner up 2011 Ms World sooner or later. The fawning from the reporters and photographers, blech! Beauty titlists are not the next coming of Christ!

And how about Diane Necio? Poor girl, or is it Poor, thank you girl? Her backer at the Ms International tilt is not as doggone persistent (or is it annoying?) as Cory Quirino of the Ms World Philippines org.

All Diane Necio won was some kind of People's Choice Awards through online voting. Well, at least she won something. Try again next time like Abby Cruz, a perennial Luz Valdez in local beauty contests. I almost feel sorry for Diane Necio, but she'll be an artista anyway. You can bet on it.